Test only - Getting confused accidentally setting up two accounts..

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BlogLovin' my way into the Blogging World

Well this is confusing. Trying to connect everything social media wise with BlogLovin. Also confusing. For all you lot who are already doing it and 'Blog Lovin' it' you're thinking..

Nooo it's so easy peezy lemon squeezy!!

Well it's not. It's stupid confusing. Not lemon squeezy in anyway. But I'm getting there (I think at the bottom of this post is the 'Follow my blog with Bloglovin') so hopefully that then links you to things and me to things and if I want to apply to Campaigns then I can. Still not completely sure how that all works but we are getting there aren't we. 
Yes.

I think I need to eat. I've not eaten much today. Not really felt myself, generally, lately. I had a nice bath earlier though and washed my hair for the first time in like a week and a day.  I KNOW RIGHT! ERRRRR, but it was doing fine honest. (Dry Shampoo did help me but my hair didn't seem to get that bad, it doesn't really, maybe it's a coloured hair kind of thing, don't take my word on that though because I am not a hair dresser or hair person. I am just given things to use and I use them that's all) 
Last week on Monday I was at the Tigi Academy for a presentation job so I had it coloured and cut then and thought I'd just leave it a bit. When you get your hair coloured, hair people always say to try and leave it for as long as possible before washing because it's better, it keeps the colour more or something along those lines. 

Sometimes I follow this advice and sometimes I don't. 

But like I said I've not felt very much myself lately and I have and am still very much very tired. Exhausted. Just keep falling asleep all the time. Silly. This Snapchat filter is cute though.. There's me in my tartan onesie. Love tartan. It almost matches my bed spread.

I'm not really a big Snapchatter. Snapper. The filters are cute but I don't OTT with them. It's effort really isn't it? Plus who wants to see your face (all the time) with every single silly filter on. Surely your face is the best just how it is. But hands up to Snapchat with all these new filters, keeps it funny and sometimes, usually when I'm travelling or on an important job I open a snap from someone and am in HYSTERICS because it is just so so hilarious. Then I just laugh for ages and can't stop. Those are the times. 


So today I was supposed to do loads. I didn't really do that much. I did a bit. I'm tired again but trying to tell myself that I am not. If I lie in bed I will just fall asleep. I half tidied my room. Well when I say half I mean half halfed, well I did a bit. Only a little bit. Then I got tired. I looked for some jobs. I called some people. I saw a friend and had a catch up which was lovely. I'm trying not to do too much because then I'll just be more tired. I get like this when I overwork myself. It's really really annoying and there's nothing I can do about it and I usually accidentally ignore the warning signs.. Migraines etc. I just keep going. 



I guess writing all this is like escaping from tidying but also because I recently read a blog post Free Apps you should get if you're a Blogger - by Maria J - it was great so do check it out. I'm so new to this and I still haven't got a clue so it was nice to know what apps to use, and free apps at that. The scheduling one is something I am going to look into for sure as I've heard from other bloggers that they use that one a lot because if not they forget to post and post at the times when people check things. 

I'll have a lookie and let you know what I think. If anyone would like to provide more information about Blogger or the Blogging World to me I would appreciate it as have been contacted by people to do some and I think some Vlogging stuff too. Eeeeek! Exciting and new though. A new adventure. 

This post alone was about to be learning about putting my blog code or something into a post so I can claim my blog on Blog Lovin. It's not that hard, once you're in blogger mode. Blogger brain. I always accidentally type Brian, which I always laugh about, even if it's just me in a room, alone. 

------> Follow my blog with Bloglovin <------

That's it there. 
Anyway I must go eat and finish/start tidying and do some other things too.

Thanks for scrolling
Amy xx

Can't Sleep? Me either.

 

Lately I've had problems sleeping. It's always been a constant battle of getting to sleep. Unless I am completely and utterly knackered then I just fall asleep of course. As a normal person doing normal things (which sometimes I wish I could do) and going to bed at that normal time and then waking up at a normal time is what my mother always tells me about. 

"If you had a normal job you would sleep normally and then you'd feel better"

None of all this, go to bed at 2am ish and then wake up around 10 or 11am or even later depending on how tired I am or what I've done recently. Or getting up at 4am to get a coach to London for the day and then working those unsociable hours because that's just what works right now, being flexible. 

I've been thinking of reasons that disturb my sleep patterns, my routine, my thought processing and generally I think it's all down to how I lead my life at the moment. Obviously it is. I've had a tough year, modelling has been good in terms of working with new people and very established well known companies and brands so that's been really good, but all the other stuff around that has been a bit poo. Time is the best thing to sort your head out and let go of the bad things (or the bad people) even if that is easier said than done. 2017 so far has been okay, and I'll just keep plodding through it, sorting a few things out along the way. I've been pretty happy lately which has been nice. 

Things work out or they just don't, plod plod. 

Keep going. 

Can't change things just do your thing. 

Find your thing. 

Plod plod.

Working in hospitality as well as modelling is just what I'm doing at the moment. That needs to change, just as a growing up kind of thing. I love it, I really do. I like working with people, meeting new people, building that relationship between customer and client and it's what I've always done and been happy with. I'm just finding it difficult thinking long term. I'm not a long term kind of person. I'm not really sure why. I've always just thought, Oh right now this is good, I'm having fun, I'm enjoying life. I think like that for everything, jobs, relationships, life, you know the normal things. But really I should, and have been thinking, for a number of years now, that I really should sort that bit out. Sort out how not to think about that. Also sort out not thinking about making other people happy before myself. Sort out just being happy (which I am sometimes but I just need to change a few bits around now to make life work)

Doing things to make people happy. If they're happy I'm happy. 

Sometimes it's easy to say that and to think that to myself but perhaps it's just an easy option. I personally think (and I know others have said to me too) that I can do better. 

I want to do better.

Expect nothing, appreciate everything. I think this is really important.

It's a good way of thinking about things and not to get yourself into a muddle, especially when it comes to relationships and by that I mean both friends and boys - for me (or girls for you, or boys or whatever) Some people might view this statement as a negative one, but no, it's just a straight up one, it says it for what it is. Just how it is, no biggie.

I am just a little scared to be honest. I'm scared about life. Maybe that's what you find out when you grow up more. Maybe that's why you're told to go to College, to University, then some Grad course, or a Masters, because it's helping you shape your life, helping you think like that. I tried to do a course afterwards, I just didn't know what in, what to do or more so because I never got the job, which is a recurring thing these days, a normal job I mean. 

Telling yourself to be positive, then you don't get it, then again, being positive, you don't get it, then again try again and again and again and then you just feel shit.

I get it it's a hard world out there and things change, things change a lot and there are always people who want to do the same as you and yes keep trying and keep pushing for it. 

Some get it, some don't. 

It's not an easy journey, but life never is (for the majority of people anyway). It's hard and it's so easy to stop trying to achieve what you want. It's exhausting and stupid and I hate the job hunt so so much. Just be positive, don't let it get you down. The thing that happens is you apply to alllllllll these things and you hear nothing or you apply to alllllllll these things and the company actually reply (basically) saying 'Sorry but you're not as good as other people who have applied and you're not that skilled but don't worry keep trying' Yeah that makes you feel so amazing right. The constant battle of am I ever going to get anywhere with something that I want to do, not knowing what I want to do but I know anything I apply for is something I would be good at, but am just never given the chance. I'm not some kid who's just finished uni or about to, I'm not on some grad course and working out my next steps, what's going to be in the next chapter, who's going to be the star player or the romance. This is not some lovely life book this is something I am just trying to work out. 

I found this image on Instagram and it pretty much is relatable (plus I love snails)

I try not to compare myself to others (I'm not talking about 'famous people' or 'celebrities' but the people who you actually know). I know it's hard to look at photos people put online about their life and saying look how happy I am. Sometimes they are, and maybe sometimes they're not. I'm not bothered if they're not and it's all for show. If you're happy that's great. 

As a single person, completely single. I don't even have a pet cat or dog. Or a baby or any potential men (sadly) it can sometimes be sad to see all these happy people enjoying life with their partner or going on mental holidays and adventures. All these things I'd love to do with someone. I could go on holiday alone, but for me personally I just don't want to. I want to enjoy my time somewhere with someone, whether it's a happy or a not so happy memory in the long term.

It's about experiences.

So all these things are in my head, the majority of the time and sure now you're thinking and I already  know, this is why I find it hard to close my eyes, to sleep, to relax. So I sometimes just have a break from it all, to escape, even if it's just me in my room chilling out, listening to music, trying not to think of everything and anything. Or what I do is do too much, push myself too much and then get exhausted. So exhausted I can't sleep, I want to, but I can't. Then I'm back in the routine of in and out of sleeping. The weird dreams. Where my brain is trying to squish all my thoughts together and make sense of them. Working from the subconscious thoughts and then some random bits and trying to work it all out and put into some sort of memory block. 

You can't sleep because you're not letting yourself. You're stressed, you're over tired. You're exhausted. You need a break from thinking about all this stuff. Don't get down about it. 

You're doing just fine.

(and that snail image above is just so good)

I think that's the main one really. 

You're doing just fine. 

Don't overthink. 

Sleep will happen eventually. 

Tea helps. I like tea. I drink a lot of tea, it makes me happy. (Tea and biscuits is the best) But I also like herbal teas because they are good for you aren't they? Nice and calming. Good for sleep time. 
I really like Pukka tea. I've been trying to test out new flavours. I recently bought the peppermint and liquorice one. I mean separately they're great but together I am not that sure. My favourites are Detox and Night Time and new one Cleanse. They all smell like feet but when brewed properly they are amazing. Like an amazing pair of smelly feet. I don't really like feet generally, but anyway try Pukka tea if you haven't already. 

Hopefully my sleep pattern will sort itself out and my brain too. Rest is important.
I'm at my mums, doing this, and looking for normal jobs. She's made carrot cake, my favourite and a cup of tea so I must go. But this has been fun right?

Speak soon,
Amy 
xx

A Worrier and A Warrior - A life plod

Well... the last two posts got a lot of response, more so than I thought they would have ! Probably because I posted on Facebook, made them a little more public, which is always a little bit scary because you're like ...

'Hey you, want to read about my rambles? My life? 

Hey are you bored? Are you looking for something to do, to read?' 

I've gotten over (kind of) writing 'Read if you want to' because that's automatically putting a negative feeling into the status, .. 'Please read me?' I mean it's cool, I'm cool if you don't want to, that's fine too..

I don't know, really I'm still new to this blogging world and I am getting behind on posts that I should have done a while ago and then something new happens and I'm like OMGGGG I want to write about this. Hence why at the moment my blog is a little bit here and there. 

'Hello Everything, Hello Now, Hello Then' 

I'll get there honest. I'm just finding my feet, sorting my head out a little and trying not to get lost. EEK!

My dad called me the other day, the other week, I've been so busy with everything, mostly modelling but a little bit of life too,, that my brain is all over the place and today is chill day (I'm still in my PJs). He had read my posts and, well this is something you just know is going to happen.. 
Your parents have a view on your life, for me I really value my parents opinions and advice because I am really indecisive and then feel like I can easily get into a muddle if I am not sure if I'm going in the right direction. 

I'm a worrier. Sometimes I tell myself that I'm a Warrior. 

Sometimes I can be that Warrior but when things get tough and my brain is all over the place I am that Worrier. 

Maybe I should have a badge, half and half. (All I'm thinking about right now is Harry Potter Houses, because I have the badges for them, because I'm so cool ;) hmmm) 

My dad, the wise words from a parent, explained to me that my posts were good but could be better, and basically I shouldn't speak badly of people that I've worked with or any of that and yeah sure I get that. So I won't.

I didn't name names but yeah it's silly to write the bad stuff, there's sites for that isn't there? Trip Advisor? How was your experience? Life Advisor, How is your experience going? 

Anyway so I probably won't talk about the bad because the bad makes me feel bad and the bad makes others feel bad.. I mean I might touch on a few things but only because it's related to things, maybe relationships. The confusing ones anyway. To say something is bad is an opinion, my opinion only. But tbh I may not bother because even writing about it is boring me, so you're definitely bored right now.

That's what blogs are about, giving your opinion on things. Saying what you like not what Jane down the road likes. 

(I don't know anyone called Jane) 

My friend Verity lives down the road though (but she'd hate me writing about her) Unless it's the 'Jezzy and Legs Cooking Show', our little pretend cooking show that we talk about because we need to, want to learn about cooking because it's a good skill to have. I think so. Or about a road trip (we like those)

Does anyone else feel like when they've had such a busy few weeks, months, non stoppness of life (and I should stop but I have things to do and sort out and obviously try to make rent and other monies) that they just want to ignore everyone? Checking social media platforms and updating life is such a chore. (updating on the modelling world life is important now as it can have an impact on the amount of work you get) I am at the point where I've been oh so busy I just can't be bothered. I can't be bothered to reply to texts or sort the things out that I'm supposed to do. Sleep doesn't even fix it. Is this when you just know you need a break? My agent asked if I had a boyfriend because of the lack of not calling every other day for updates.. Sadly no. 

Parents ask the same thing so I make sure I text them on a daily basis, I don't want them to have any false hope. 

Moving house when I did, it wasn't planned and I hadn't planned for it in terms of money or anything so the last month and this month which has been stupid but good busy with modelling means I am a little stressed because it's Summer soon and I would like to go on holiday and I would like to be able to pay rent, bills and have a life. So I have to just keep going and remain positive even though I am in a whirlwind of decisions right now. 

My life is a whirlwind right now, it's all or nothing, I'm up here and down there. Not much inbetween, I need a massive sort out, both of materialistic things and brain things. 

If you feel I'm ignoring you, I'm not really doing it on purpose I just can't help it. I just need a break from life at the moment. I can sit in my room for hours on end listening to music and at the same time not even paying attention to it.

The life plod is a real one though. Being a warrior all the time is hard and being a worrier all the time is annoying. So I'm both, and happy to admit that. Some days are good and some are bad and some I know that I'll find difficult to get through but I'll get through those, I've done it before so it'll take time but in the end I'll be fine. :) 

KEEP PLODDING!! 

I think other people just term it as 'KEEP POSITIVE'. 

IT'S THE POSITIVE PLOD OF LIFE. 

Maybe I should write a book. :)

I need a cup of tea (I've eaten all my rich tea biscuits)

Speak soon, Thanks for reading if you did.

Amy xx

The very start of LFW AW17 - The first half of the first day - Working with Tigi

Okay so, this is going to be a pretty big post, just to let you know ahead of the game. 

There's a lot to talk about in this subject of 'LFW AW17' and right now I'm just going to type away and see how far I get with it. My plan initially was to write stuff up the day or couple of days during the week as it would have been easier to remember. But we'll just try it out and maybe I'll add some oh so exciting photos in too, so it's a little more interesting, words and pictures ;) .. 

Most are from Snapchat, and yes there are some selfies because I had my hair done (again) so basically you'll get to see my face a lot, and I haven't really edited it because frankly I can't be bothered, so you get the whole deal. LUCKY! It's a good way to keep a journal though but since then I've switched to Instagram as that automatically saves your photos and you don't think shit I've lost my whole day because Snapchat doesn't have that automatic option.. Stupid.

Edit.. So I had to have this post as 'the first half of the first day' just because well there's a lot to read. BUT! I have included photos, skills right? ;)

So everything I do I have to put in my calendar on my phone, I live on dates, not days and if you've read any other of my very exciting but no connection posts then you'll know I've already explained that. Right now my head thinks it's Friday, or maybe Friday tomorrow. Luckily I put everything I do into this little calendar on the phone, my computer is really slow and freezes a lot and basically I need  a new one... the whole syncing this to that and so you can see everything together just confuses me.

Monday 13th February, time is flyinggg.. I got up super early and got the coach (National Express) at 7.25am to begin my journey to London for the start of LFW castings as well as having a job confirmed with Tigi. EXCITING!! 

(I was VERY tired) 

I love driving past Big Ben, in the hazy morning light (plus a cute snapchat filter) it reminds me of Hogwarts and there's me imagining muggles everywhere running to work and then wizards squished into all the people going through secrets doors and then that really fast bus. Sometimes my brain thinks strange things when I'm tired... no seriously.. my brain thinks like this all the time, I just have to calm it down sometimes (I try) So you're welcome ;) And I had to change brian to brain a few times, ....

I had this job all the way in Battersea where Tigi Academy and Studio is based, it's okay as the coach gets straight into Victoria and then I have to wait around for that annoying 170 bus which for some reason takes forever. When I wait for buses in Norwich or little countryside villages back at home and the bus is 10 minutes late I'm fuming but in London 10 mins it's okay I just hunt for Pokemon or plan my routes for the day.. like a cool kid. 

Saying that about Pokemon, being on buses quite a lot of the time is pretty good as they go so slowly that you can pass it for 'walking' and it helps you hatch eggs quicker.. plus you can find lots of new pokemon and collect things along the way..

The Tigi job was just a presentation so that's super easy for me, I just had a colour refresh, had some yellow bits put in rather than the usual pink. Overall, it went from a very faded copper/red colour (as seen below) to a nice fresh red, orange, yellow, fire, (order of the) Phoenix colour. I liked it. :)

I sent a photo to my mum of my new hair, she text back saying 

'I love it you look like you're from the Lion King...'

I think we definitely have the same weird brain powers..

I love the team at Tigi they're so great and welcoming. As I've worked with them so much the last year and a bit I feel like family there and very comfortable with them and pretty laid back with hair cuts and colours (both of which seem to be a constant change for me) In the modelling world, well not that I should 'diss' anyone or companies, but you know sometimes you just click with the client and vice versa, it's a mutual acceptance. Some people of course always seem to be shy working with such a big brand but I've always been confident with them. I once went to Italy and had to meet them at the airport and I remember feeling a little lost and strange because I'm working with the actual Tigi team, the creative team and meeting the big boss. (He's lovely though) It always makes me smile that they all know my name, that sounds silly I know but it's a really nice feeling. 

They really are the best team of people I've ever worked with! 

Today, it was myself and a new fellow model from my agency (Oxygen Models in London) called Juliet Thurbin. Previously we had another job with Tigi a few weeks ago when we'd met for the first time and I remember that then it was her first ever job with the agency AND a fresh cut and colour job with Tigi, which is always a little daunting. This time it was the second Tigi job and second time I'd met her, so was nice to have a catch up and work with a familiar face. The first time round I could see she was nervous, but explained to her that they always work with you. Obviously it is our job to be there and basically do anything they want as they are the client.. but I feel with Tigi they do want you to feel happy and comfortable with your hair and feel like it's still you. If that makes sense anyway. 

The outfits we wear are always really really cool. Jiv, who is the stylist for Tigi, sources all the outfits for the year and these are used for various campaigns, shows, shoots and presentations throughout the year. The red/orange leopard print dress I actually wore for the Campaign SHIFT for Tigi which was shot in Summer last year. (I'll try and add a link in, that or plop it into another post because this one is turning out a lot bigger than I had planned. Eeek!) It wasn't put together with the other layers as seen in this photo but it always looks pretty cool. Plus I'm easy breezy with outfits for jobs, 

I'm there to model for them, not to complain about outfits.. 

I kept noticing photos of me from the Shift Collection Campaign around the Academy which was cool! and the book is out too so that was nice to look through. See photos below for a little glimpse. 

I love the products from Tigi, they smell amazing I just want to eat them all. They work amazing with your hair, any hair type. I get given products which is super great and this does not usually happen on model jobs. I don't really get it to be honest. If someone is colouring your hair (and it's for a model job) then surely you should be given at least something, shampoo or conditioner to keep your hair looking good, just the way they made it for you at that time. Partly because I am totally clueless and why is it that in the salon they make it look amazing and then you leave and go home and try to re create it the next day and IT NEVER WORKS.. Plus normal shampoos/conditioners are so so bad for your hair, especially if it's coloured and I NEVER knew this before (because I don't really understand hair and make up and beauty things) So really it's good I get given products! and super nice products! :)

These two are my favourites at the moment (below), as they are mini and I took them with me for my LFW adventure - Joyride and Masterpiece Hairspray. It's great they are so small, so you can take them anywhere with you, but also I find other hair sprays I've used in the past, make your hair either so hard the wind does not move it at all, like really stupid hard and everyone can see you have A LOT in.. or super sticky.. and this one I feel is good because it's neither of those. Joyride is a new product and you just put a small amount on your palm and scrunch it into your hair, you hardly need much at all, it's kind of like a serum/wax but not wax consistency. The names of the products are always interesting ;) and the colours are cool. I feel like a proper Bedhead fan, I now know the products by their name and not just colour! I know how to use them because I've worked with Tigi a lot and ask them questions so I can go home and test them out. I personally like volumising products the best because my hair is very very very straight. 

I've been on a few jobs (not with Tigi) where the client has just sat you down and said right this is what we're going to do (and there was no mention prior to my arrival that they were going to cut my hair at all, it was just a colour job) So you can gather, if you know me anyway, I'm not the kind of person you can lie to and make stuff up and say 'Oh no we did discuss this before and you said that's fine' No I didn't, if you told me you wanted to cut my hair (and you're not Tigi or my hairdresser friends in Norwich who I trust) I will not let you touch my hair. That sounds petty I know, but why would I do a job where I'm not getting paid, even expenses and if there are expenses it's not a lot and you want to use me for your work.. but then you have a hissy fit because I'm asking you to pay me like £20 or occasionally more if I get the train. I'm working with you all day, this is your job as well as mine, plus you work for quite a big and well know company.. and you're not even going to feed me either. 

That's just not cool. 

You think that's okay? I've been in this (modelling) world a while now and I can see from a mile off that you think I'm new to it and especially new to 'hair modelling'. 'Oh we're only going to give you a trim... looking at your hair it needs it...' 'WELL, actually I had it cut literally the other day so why are you B***S***ing me?! Idiots. 

It annoys me so so much. Then they dye my hair, do all that, dry it etc then are combing through it and get the scissors (which they are secretly hiding behind me) and start doing that 'TRIM' ... So I say, 'Excuse me what are you doing? We've just had a conversation about this' (at this point I'm thinking they must really be that unintelligent/ a general idiot to think this is okay..) 'Oh I just thought I'd sort the length out, neaten it for you..' I shuffle. When I say shuffle, I move so much they spend time re-adjusting their sections.. They ask 'Are you ok?' I wish I could just say 'F OFF' ... but I don't.. (because that would be deemed as unprofessional) I sit there and just think I am never going to work with you again and I will inform everyone I know about you and your stupid ways. It's sad because he found me through someone he used to work for and that person is really lovely and doing so well he even has his own salon in London now. I am pleased for him, he's nice. He apologised on behalf of this other idiot. I was angry all day. But that's just one day, I'm fine now. I'm over it. But I'll never work with him again. 

There's no trust there, and trust is very important, to me.

That's the thing with (SOME) hairdressers in this world (some who I've worked with), I didn't realise before but in some companies they teach you about all the normal techniques, and then they teach you about the 'trends'. So you go in and say what you want but in the end they just choose you a hair cut that is in line with 'current trends'. 

You'll hate it, because it's not what you asked for, you won't kick off because it'll get you no where, your hair has been changed, you're still not sure if you like it the next day, the next week, then you'll love it and forget all about it being not what you originally asked for. But you're on trend. Right? Who wouldn't want that. I guess it's about fashion too, if you work in retail you understand (and I used to, so I get it) 

People want whats on trend, what everyone is talking about, what's cool right now.

Me, I'm not that fussed. It's nice to have a hair cut before the actual trend hits everyone else, that's kind of cool. I don't have to find somewhere and someone else who I trust to sort my hair for me. So that's good and easy, and I get paid for it. I know that if you always colour your hair it ruins it or something, makes it go grey (eventually) quicker.. but right now, I'm earning from it, it looks good, I like it and YOLO. But clothes wise, I like what I like and I don't like what I don't so I don't just buy it because it's cool for like a month. 

That's just silly.

I think for 'the first half of the first day' for LFW should really round itself up a bit now. I'm getting tired writing and I'm hungry. I'll write the second half of the first day tomorrow and then the days after will probably be one post per day or squished together if not much happened, we'll see.

Thanks for reading, even if you did some scrolling.

Amy xx

Barbapapa - Shape shifter - Welcome to the Modelling World...

I've had such a busy few days. It seriously feels like I've been away from home for weeks, but those weeks are infact only 3 days. 

I travelled to London the evening of Thursday 2nd March, stayed at a friends, had an amazing dinner cooked for me (thanks) then VERY early Friday morning at 4.30am we got a taxi to Heathrow for our journey to Paris, for Paris Fashion Week (I'll abbreviate this to PFW just so it is easier to write and squishes up the word count so you don't get bored) We were cutting it a bit fine to get to the Airport (thank you Addison Lee for parking outside the wrong house and not letting us know you had arrived to pick us up), I think this is the general thing about taxi's.. maybe more so in London.. I'm paying for your service, I give you an address -which usually you can sat nav- and you still mess that up. Strange. You see I'm used to my local taxi's, at least they know where they are driving, map or not, it's your job, you get used to roads right.. 

Anyway. So we eventually got to the airport and luckily had checked in online so that was fine, went through security, no problems - they usually wiggle that stick all over me, but this time I didn't get that experience, just straight through, put on some of my (one of) favourite perfumes - Miss Dior from the duty free shop and headed to our gate. We didn't spend long in the airport, which is probably a good thing as I would have ended up buying more perfume or another Mac lipstick, both of which I have a lot of, I mean these are some of my favourite things. 

I say I'm not girly. I tell people, I tell boys, that I'm not girly at all.. and then there's me saying 'I love perfume and lipstick' WHAT IS HAPPENING!

I've recently bought some (quite a few) Limecrime lipsticks, which I'll write about another time because they are AMAZING. I love them. I have a favourite atm too (Posh, it's a metallic purple), I feel bad for the others, but they'll get their chance.

So you're probably thinking what with the status 'Barbapapa', well I saw this cute character maybe last year, I can't remember if it's a book I bought my sister or the other way around, or if it's just something I saw and liked it, then I saw it again in Paris the other day and was literally like OMGGGG! I'll go into more detail of my experience of PFW later.

So there's a few comparisons that Barbapapa has when I think of modelling, the past few weeks have been very up and down, mostly up and positive thinking but when it's down, it's right down there.

Barbapapa, as it says above, 'was born in a garden, just like a flower', me however, I was not born in a garden like Bill and Ben, I was born in a hospital in Essex (Barking). We moved to Norfolk when I was 3 or 4, one of those anyway, for my dads job and no I don't have an Essex accent (not that that's a bad thing, it isn't, I just don't have one) and no I don't have a Norfolk accent either, I think I'm pretty neutral speaking. 

'He can take any form. He is very nice, everybody likes him' 

I'm pretty sure not everybody likes me, but that's their issue not mine, I'm not really that bothered, obviously everyone wants to feel like they're liked, sometimes they are and sometimes they're not. That's just the way it is. You realise that more as you get older. It's something I've only really discovered this past year. It's sad to think people who you thought were your really good friends just fade, but then you meet some people for the first time and you're like I love you! I think you're great, we should be friends and it just clicks and you know they're not a dick, I mean sometimes they are, but that's what life is about, live it how you want and you make changes along the way. I give people chances, maybe one, sometimes two. 

A lot of people (I've heard) think I'm this girl, this model who is so up herself and looks down on others.. I'm not sure why or how they think that, especially if they've not met me, how can you judge? I'm very opinionated but I feel you can only judge by experiencing. I mean people are weird aren't they. But then you see these so called (I don't like her, but I've never spoken to her) girls.. they meet me and they're like 

'Ohhhh you're not what I thought you would be like!' and I'm like....... 'Cool' :)

That's okay, I don't mind, it's okay, I'll be nice to you, why wouldn't I be? I tend to talk to people like I've known them forever, I think it's how my parents are, the way I've been brought up. Living in the countryside you grow up going on walks, sometimes with the dogs or cats and you walk past people (random people) and you say 'Hello' or 'Good Morning' and then you say hello to their dogs too and it's just like a mutual acquaintance thing people do, I think it's just a countryside/small village thing. I do it everywhere though, in the city (Norwich, the small pond where you tend to walk past about 5 people in a row who you know) or London on the tubes or buses, in shops etc. I just have no worry in talking to new random people. 

I just think, imagine if it was the other way round, I always want people to feel comfortable and welcomed so perhaps that's why I like meeting new people. 

I'm good at the old mingling (not with men though it seems, and there's another post story for you which is not related to this one). 

I also am always happy to help others if they need it, even if they don't ask for it, I understand how life is hard and sometimes you feel alone and you feel hopeless and you don't know what to do or what to say, I get it, and if I think I can help in any way, I will say so. If people are happy I am happy. I've always put people before myself, and over time I've realised this is not what people really do, not everyone of course but a lot of people are very selfish, you have to be sometimes, I get that too. I sometimes find it difficult to work this out, but that's it, people are just selfish, you take it for what it is or you don't. Don't get too sensitive about it, it doesn't get you anywhere but building up more negativity, which is badddd. Take it for what it is, that's it. When things get tough that's what I have to say to myself, not to get wrapped up in it, especially in the 'Model World', there's so much that goes on, that the rest of people (I don't want to say 'the norms' but that is how people not in the industry are associated, 'the normal people') it's easier to say than.. People not in the fashion industry. It's not a bad thing, it's hard to write it like that and for people to not take offence, because people always take offence, that's why I have to write it down like that. 

That's just the way it is. OK. 

So lastly. 'With a few shape shifting and a brilliant imagination, he smoothly overcomes the most difficult situations!'

This one is my favourite, as I'll cover more about the 'Model World' in a few more posts. Yes it is a fun lifestyle and yes it is hard work, and yes I do enjoy it, but there's also a lot of it that people don't hear about or see. It's very hard to hold onto positivity sometimes and there are days where I've felt like F IT I'M GOING TO QUIT THIS.. and then you have a breather and a think and the next day or next hour is another time, more space to get the positive thinking back and then you feel okay again. 

It's a world full of the positive and the negative. 

Each take their toll on you, and really you just have to deal with it, for your own mind. A sense of security and try not get lost along the way. Play the game a little, but not too much.. Be a shape shifter.

That's my opinion of it anyway.  The flash your cash side is not for me for example, the flirting with other men when you have a bf that cares for you, and you feel like you can do want you want because 'Oh he'd never leave me'. Another thing to touch upon in many more posts, .. Is this why (some) men have such a problem with dating models? I mean to be honest I feel I am sometimes a tad naive in the modelling world, I've seen a lot but not said a lot, because you just take it for what is it. You play it how you want to play it and sometimes people play it very selfishly and then they get wrapped up in it all. Which is sad to see, I mean I'm happy for you but the way you're acting is just so sad, you're lost in it. 

I'll explain everything about this world, how it is but without naming names of course and locations will have to be adjusted to no names and no location, but maybe just a general overview of a few things I've noticed over the years of modelling. Certain situations that I've been a part of whether by choice or not. I've signed a few things off in contracts along the way so will have to be careful and not get in trouble but will give you as much information as I can ! 

When I look at Barbapapa I (sometimes) feel like this is me, in the modelling world and generally really. When you see other models who are smaller than you (because they are usually younger than you, and let's face it, your body changes so much when you get older) Plus today is me feeling like a slug day, I am soooooo exhausted from the trip and travelling, so many trains, tubes and buses just yesterday alone totally took my energy from me and that's just yesterday, the long journey home. 

It's very hard to not think you should lose some weight to be seen as the 'appropriate' size for modelling, all I can say is, yes I am aware my bum has got a little big over the last few months, 
WHY IT IS THAT BEING A WOMAN MEANS WHEN YOU LOSE WEIGHT IT'S OFF YOUR STOMACH AND BOOBS BUT NOT YOUR BUM!! WHYY WHY WHY!? (Yes I know why, but sometimes I just feel like a big fat slug, I know I'm not and no I'm not asking for compliments I'm just saying that's how I feel sometimes, Okay). I don't go to the gym either, I probably should, my mum keeps telling me it's going to all catch up with me one day, and every year I get a little older I think, shit this will be the year and I'll just turn into looking like Barbapapa. A big squishy candy floss cartoon character... 

So there's a little update of my brain into the modelling world. There will be more of course, but let's not bore you too much. (I'm supposed to be looking for 'proper jobs' today, and no I have not looked at as many as I was planning to, or even applied)

Thanks for reading,
Amy xx

A little update!

Hello :)

Sorry it's been a while..

No this update isn't ... I'm in a relationship, I'm engaged, I'm married, I'm pregnant (hope not - joke), I'm moving to Australia, I'm moving abroad, I've got a new job anyway the list goes on..

I've just had a REAAAAALLLLY busy February and basically days go by and I have no idea on time or days it's all about dates (sadly not with anyone but.. there is always some hope) 

I've moved house, I guess that's a pretty big update (No I'm not the owner, I'm renting with 3 random people who I have no mutual friends with - strange but they're nice!) It's a fresh start, I'm no longer living in a room the size of a bed (literally). It was just like Harry Potter's Cupboard (but it wasn't under the stairs) so so small I didn't even have a wardrobe in my room! I had the airing cupboard converted into my wardrobe in the hallway. But now I have lots of space, more than before anyway and it's really weird but I feel alive again having space and trying to keep my scattyness organised.. (difficult but getting there) 

I now have my desk from my parents house and my computer all set up in my room which is great because it means I can listen to music and watch stuff from bed. I know these are all normal things but for the past nearly 2 years I've lived in a box (in a house) and now I can actually say that I can walk around my room naked... although I have two windows facing a lot of houses/flats opposite me.. it's okay I'm sure they don't mind ;) 

But that's good and it's strange to think that just moving house, has really changed the way I think and feel. I feel much more comfortable having all my stuff around me in the same room and yes new things are always tough in the beginning but it can only get better (unless I can't pay my rent) So even though at the time it wasn't planned and yes I was very upset because everything seemed to be going wrong at the same time and I had no control over any of it, all I had to think about in amongst the stress was to just try to remain positive. Packing up my old room (and I had stuff in the attic and all over) was a mission! My mum actually said to me "I can't believe you did all this packing yourself!" "So organised" "Well Done" and to be honest I hated packing, it stresses me out and packing with someone else there even if it's just them chatting to you is SOOO much easier than doing it alone. But I did well, it took me a few days (on and off obviously my concentration levels aren't top notch) 

Moving day both my parents helped out which was good because I was hungover and tired and had a busy week ahead which was not ideal considering I was moving house. The room I've moved from had a lot of shelves, imagine a cave with grooves all the way around the side, yep that is my room, then lots of things under the bed too.. it was a small but furnished room.. and now I've moved into a bigger, but unfurnished and no shelves room, you can see where this is going.. all my stuff that used to live on the shelves including plants and baskets - I love baskets -  are currently all on the window sills or my desk/dotted around and it's a bit scatty at the moment. Until I sort new shelves. But I love my new room. I have A LOT of clothes, I have TOO MANY clothes which I really need to sort out (GET RID OF) I have a lot of nice clothes, some given to me, some bought stupid spending, so I'm going to set up a Depop account, somehow link it to my Instagram and hopefully sell my stuff to nice new homes. - I have some things I've never even worn, this must be a girl thing, I've heard other people say that so I'm not feeling bad ... (I feel a bit bad)

Ok, so that's the first update, I moved house. 

Second update is I modelled in this years AW17 LFW. I've done the past few seasons, but never to be honest got as many shows as I did this year WOOOO 
 - I'll do a separate post on those because if not you'll get bored reading this one and to be honest I could write for days about fashion week and modelling and all the goss and drama and all that.. I've been thinking about it for a while.. and I'll write it how it is and not what you think fashion week and modelling is all about and there's plenty of shit times but that's just how it is. Anyway that's another post, another time, when I get time. <3

So yes I've just got back from London last week, having done some shows for LFW as well as working with Tigi a fair bit.. So the evening of 22nd Feb I got home, caught up with life on 23rd then 24th Feb was MY BIRTHDAY!! It was amazing, best birthday for a while. I was in a good mind place and feeling positive and happy after LFW and just generally everything was really good. Again this is supposed to be a little summary of updates (and I'll write more details in other posts, as I've got so much to do today) 

After my Birthday weekend I've been back to London for a job with Tigi, just a presentation, photos to follow ;) then back home again for pancakes with my new housemates and some wine.. 

Worked Wedn, was supposed to have a shoot today with Norfolk Living magazine which I was really looking forward to, however unfortunately my lift there cancelled last minute and buses are a bit shit in Norfolk and don't tend to go to all the little towns and no one could pick me up and I don't drive so basically couldn't do it which I am actually really sad about (and if you're reading this Katy and Amanda and the team I am really really sorry, I've never ever been that unreliable model and I feel so bad but hopefully I can work with you again soon) Check out Norfolk Living the rest of you, it's pretty cool, always good to know what's going on locally and be proud of where we live. I love the countryside, I hate buses. 

Later today I'm travelling back to London, staying at a friends house (who I met during LFW  on a show and she's really nice and we get on and that does not usually happen especially during fashion weeks) 

Then tomorrow we are FLYING TO PARISSSSSSSS for PFW! 

VERY EXCITING! :) 

and this is why I shouldn't typing and thinking about blogs but I should be packing and sorting and getting ready for another busy few mental days of fashion week modelling times.

So they're my big updates, I'm literally doing a flying visit to Paris (if you want to follow me, I'll be posting on my facebook page - which I try to do - but more so my Instagram and snapchat, sometimes twitter.. 

Instagram - legslikesyou

Snapchat - l3g5 

Twitter - amy_woodman

and well you'll find my FB page under my name.

Oh and then I'm back home to do some modelling for Norwich Fashion Week which will be fun - they are such a great team! 

Think that's all for now. I might edit this later, but I'll just post it now because I'll probably forget and I need to pack!!

Speak soon,
Thanks for reading,
Amy xx